a note from Susan..

a note from Susan...

Dear gusti arya,


Oh my, what an exciting week it has been.  I was a guest on the Loving and Lasting Google + Hangout with Ande Lyons and we had a blast talking about "Sexy is a State of Mind." If you missed it, here's the link to the hangout http://bit.ly/1rlAySq


That evening I went to the Pleasure Chest in NYC and saw Joan Price, author of several books including "Naked at Our Age Talking Out Loud About Senior Sex," speaking about...SENIOR SEX.  Yes, people over 50 are still having sex and enjoying it. However, as we age there are issues that affect our sexuality and Joan answers all your questions.

The women who attended were fabulous as they relaxed, let  their inhibitions go, and spoke with candor about their desires and challenges around sex. You see, no matter what age we are we continue to be sexual beings, we just have to adjust our attitude, mindset around sex, and learn new techniques and ways of having sex that address our aging bodies.

Whether you are married or single and over 50 your sex life shifts and changes as your body does.  I love sharing what I've experienced and what has worked for me on my journey.  

to your sexy self,

what's happening...

7 Ways to Boost Your Desire + Empower Yourself in the Bedroom
May 12th at Noon LIVE 
Send your questions to http://info@susanleemiller.com and I'll answer as many as I can on the call
Register here:
https://susanleemiller.leadpages.net/7-ways-to-boost-your-desire/

Discover Your Inner Sexy No Cost Call  APPLY NOW http://susanleemiller.com/discover-session/

feature article...

Image courtesy of stockimages/freedigitalphotos.net


Pleasure As My Birthright

When I heard the phrase several years ago “pleasure is your birthright” I didn’t really GET it.  As a woman, I’d spent pretty much my entire life believing that it was my destiny and birthright to bring pleasure to others in multiple roles; mother, wife, partner, daughter, friend…

It wasn’t until I hit my 40’s that I started to ruminate on this idea that I had the right to have my own pleasure; especially sexual pleasure without feeling guilt or shame.

Why so much guilt?

Well, I wasn’t giving to anyone or doing for anyone.  Deeply ingrained in my mind was that pleasure was all about me giving to others. I could receive pleasure, but only in small doses and in ways that were considered acceptable and meaningful by our cultural standards ~ going to the salon for hair color, shopping for clothes, shoes and jewelry, and going with the girls for lunch or dinner, a “girls night out.”

Pleasuring myself sexually was an entirely different type of pleasure and one that I didn’t even consider necessary for my well being.

Here was how I rationalized it. Self pleasuring didn’t require leaving my house. It was relatively inexpensive (accept for the initial cost of a fantastic vibrator and dildo) and orgasm had multiple benefits for my health in mind, body and spirit. It boosted my immune system, reduced the risk of mild depression (which I suffer from on occasion), fought the effects of chronic pain, and released endorphins, just a few of the myriad benefits.  Read more here in an article by Joan Price in the Huffington Post. http://huff.to/1jQN4Dl

As a woman I felt ashamed to even speak of such things. If I were to bring this up to my friends I would hear things like, “I don’t have time for that” and “I don’t need that, I’m married.” (that’s a whole other topic)

Self pleasuring was the most empowering thing I did for myself. I had total ownership of my body, my thoughts, my spirit and my emotions.

As a woman I'd felt for so many years that masturbation was just something you didn’t do, but it was exhilarating and liberating to discover I had this power to take care of myself.

I used to do it very quickly, still harboring those nasty negative and shameful feelings about it. Although I still occasionally go for the quick release because sometimes it’s just what I need, I’m more inclined at this stage in my life to immerse my whole being in the process. Also, I’m post menopausal and it just takes me longer to orgasm.

Self pleasuring has become an integral part of my health and wellness program and a celebration of my body and the amazing capacity it has for pleasure and sensation of which I am most grateful for.

LOVE to hear from you! Go on over to my blog and leave your comments http://susanleemiller.com/pleasure-as-my-birthright/